Tyler is always my laid back one. The one that I know will not just follow the wrong crowd because he has not one else but will make friends with multiply people and know he is OK with him being him. Plus he is big enough now to take care of himself and have kids tend to not mess with him. But I also know Tyler hangs out with older kids and is more likely going to find himself in situations.
Trent is my child I worry most about. He is the one that is trying to find his place and trying to figure where he fits in. He seems to draw towards kids that are not very nice to him. I am glad he is a forgiving soul but Mom can only hold her tongue for so long because some little bully is going to get the tongue lashing they deserve. He has not found the confidence inside him to be able to say NO and be OK with it as someone may not like him. He has also had to learn what it is like to come across people who make fun of him and little girl’s who’s parents have never instilled in them the fact that it is better to be nice to kids then to think that they can do or say whatever. I have been Trent and I know how this world can be and sitting back wished I had made better choices in my life but I can only guide him and at some point I know he will learn just as I have. I know it is a Mom’s job to protect them when they need it and to show tough love when it is that time too. But for now I will take the moments with both my sons when I can get them and know that it is not Mom they are running away from but into adulthood is where they are running to. For I can’t keep them little forever and I pray that all I have done for them will help them along the way and give them the answers they need to help make wise decisions.
I have never been a parent who has held back from my children. I have often shared with Tyler my life experiences much to the dislike of my Mother. It is not that I want him to think that is the way to go but to know I have been where you are and I know the road he is going down. All the road blocks that can be put up in his way and why it is not wise to chose that path. I have been told by parents that they can’t believe I am so open with him but I think back and I know my parents thought they were doing what was best for me I could not relate to them as vise versa. I want him to know I may not like the decision he has made but I am here to come talk to. I will always be in his corner as long as he is honest with me and wants to make a change and it will pertain to Trent too. If a parent puts themselves in a different category then their child ie. I never smoked put or drank before I was 21 then a child is less likely to come to a parent if they have been approached with either. If a parent tells a child “Well if you do not put yourself in that position then you will never have to worry about it” but how often is that not true. I know kids now a days have gotten meaner then when I was in school. Hello we have had mass school shootings and a huge bully problem that is going through our schools but if they do not think you can relate then how are they ever going to feel comfortable coming to you. I am not trying to be my children’s best friend but I also want them to know I have no right to judge you as no has a right to judge me for my past mistakes. I just hope that my children know that no matter what in life comes their way that Mom will always back them up and will always listen.
